When Sober Curious Strikes Past Dry January

In the beginning of 2025, the previous US Surgeon Normal issued an advisory on the hyperlink between alcohol consumption and cancer risk. Whereas it is a sobering name to motion, there isn’t a denying that sober curiosity has elevated not too long ago. From Dry January to extra manufacturers creating alcohol-free drinks to the rise of mainstream mocktails, now greater than ever even informal drinkers have gotten sober curious and analyzing their relationship with alcohol.

Final 12 months in Episode 146 of the FBG Podcast, Sobriety Coach, and Founding father of Sober Wild, Krysty Krywko, Ed.D, joined our EIC Alison for an interview on sobriety. At the moment we’re persevering with this dialog with Krysty. Dry January has handed however definitely not the questions on what we will do if we’re serious about a sober (utterly alcohol free), or damp (a discount in alcohol consumption), life. 

Tam: Ought to we strategy ingesting as all or nothing, particularly if we’re sober curious?

Krysty: I believe it’s a really private resolution, however when you’re any type of an everyday drinker (which means three or 4 nights per week “simply to unwind”) then alcohol is impacting the way in which you are feeling – mentally, emotionally, and bodily – your physique simply doesn’t know there’s one other method. In case you’re not ingesting through the week, however then ingesting a few bottles of wine over the weekend, you by no means actually get the prospect to see how your physique and thoughts reacts to no alcohol. Anna Lembke, in her guide, Dopamine Nation: Finding Balance in the Age of Indulgence, talks about how “abstaining from our drug of alternative for not less than 4 weeks provides clarifying behaviors. Perception that merely just isn’t attainable whereas we proceed to make use of.” In different phrases, you haven’t any thought how shitty you actually really feel whenever you’re utilizing a substance that’s making you are feeling shitty. It normally takes a number of weeks on your physique to regulate to the truth that you’re now not consuming a poisonous substance.

Tam: Are there concerns/finest practices to go from Dry January to extra of a Damp February and past? 

Krysty: So, I don’t actually know the reply to that query, it actually will depend on what your motivation was for Dry January. Was the plan to only see when you may make it with out ingesting for 30 days? Or had been you searching for actual well being advantages? Or did you notice that your ingesting has elevated over the previous few years and you realize you wanted to take a break?

Moderation, which is absolutely what Damp February is all about, doesn’t work for lots of people. In case you spend a variety of time bargaining with your self each time alcohol is concerned, which ends up in a variety of “guidelines” round your ingesting, you would possibly wish to take a step again.

You may not even pay attention to these guidelines. They’ve simply develop into a part of your inside chatter. That chatter would possibly sound like this:
I’m not going to drink on my own.
No ingesting earlier than 5:00 p.m.
No exhausting alcohol through the week
I’m solely going to drink white wine (or beer, or vodka, and so forth.)
I can’t have greater than two drinks on per week evening.
I can’t drink greater than two nights in a row. 

The tip days of my ingesting had been stuffed with elaborate and arcane guidelines that had been consistently shifting as I broke one after one other. I used to be letting myself down each day, and that type of self-disappointment was like a relentless stream of micro-cuts to my soul.

Take a second and take into consideration why you’re placing so many guidelines round your ingesting. You would possibly simply determine that it’s now not value it.

Tam: If somebody is studying this pondering “I should not have an issue with my alcohol consumption however wish to take a extra aware strategy to what I eat/drink,” what questions must be explored when serious about alcohol consumption? 

Krysty: One of many first issues we have to do is transfer away from the language round ingesting and the idea that there are “downside drinkers” after which everybody else. This results in disgrace, stigma, and judgement.

A way more helpful, and reasonable, mannequin to make use of in terms of speaking about alcohol is the thought of ingesting occurring on a spectrum. That’s the place the thought of “grey space drinker” emerged from, which encompasses everybody from the every-now-and-then drinker to those that are bodily hooked on alcohol. The fantastic thing about this mannequin is that you just don’t must hit any form of a all-time low earlier than you possibly can discover your relationship with alcohol, you get to determine at any level on the spectrum what’s best for you.

In case you’re able to get sincere with the position alcohol performs in your life, I might recommend sitting down with a pen and paper and answering the next questions. Get interested in your self, and take the time to reply actually. Don’t cloud your responses with disgrace, or judgement, or what your bestie goes to suppose. That is about you and the one life that you’ve got, and whether or not or not you desire a poisonous substance to play a job within the creation of that life. 

Is alcohol nonetheless working for me?
How is alcohol making me really feel?
What areas of my life has alcohol taken over?
Does ingesting align with the individual I’m now?
What would “future you” inform “current you” on this scenario?

Tam: What if our buddies have gone again to ingesting after Dry January, however we try to proceed. Do you could have solutions/suggestions for how one can make this a part of my life-style with my ingesting buddies? 

Krysty: You would possibly want to seek out new buddies – haha. However, significantly, if your mates really respect and help you within the selections you make in your life, then it shouldn’t be an issue. However, in the event that they’re regularly attempting to push you to begin ingesting once more, whining that you just’re not enjoyable anymore, or that one shot of tequila gained’t do any hurt, then you definately would possibly must rethink who you’re spending time with. You could determine for your self what you wish to do with the time that you’ve got, and the folks you spend it with. 

Moreover, in case your good friend group is closely immersed in ingesting tradition – which means most social actions revolve round alcohol – then you definately would possibly want to seek out some new peeps that love to do various things.

Tam: Any favourite “drink” hacks to exchange that Friday evening cocktail? 

Krysty: I’m probably the most primary sober individual round – and I’m pleased with ingesting a seltzer on my sofa to unwind after a busy week. However, I do know that individuals have totally different wants, and I get that within the early days of going alcohol-free you may want one thing slightly extra thrilling. Fortunately, the alcohol-free market is on fireplace! There are such a lot of merchandise available on the market – suppose flavored seltzers, glowing teas, alcohol-free beers, wines, and spirits, kombuchas – I actually may go on and on. I’m regularly impressed on the locations the place I discover alcohol-free drinks – Goal, Dealer Joe’s, Entire Meals, common grocery shops, and native alcohol-free bottle outlets are beginning to provide such all kinds. My solely warning is be intentional when utilizing alcohol-free merchandise, particularly issues like alcohol-free wine or beer. In case you’re downing a bottle of alcohol-free wine most nights of the week, it’s type of like ripping off one bandage and placing on one other, and also you would possibly wish to discover why you’re caught in the identical behaviors. 

Did you do Dry January this 12 months and keep a dry or damp February? What’s your sober curious hack? ~ Tam